Pouf Daddy

Christopher Lowell, the beloved queen who has been making me laugh for years, is now an entity in chain stores across the country. He has his own line of paint, fabric, home and office furniture, and even 3-day-fucking blinds!

And there's still his television show, inspiring people not to be afraid to 'do it yourself.' Because you CAN! Just like C-Lo, YOU can glue crap onto shit to create unique garbage for your home.

Yesterday I saw a special episode about how to throw the 'perfect party.' The most baffling part was when he turned a normal 9 inch layer cake into a 3-foot tall mayan pyramid of "fake-cake" made out of wood and ornately frosted with Flexall, a construction compound. The actual tiny cake sat on top of this monstrosity that you would later have to drive to the city dump. If you use his technique for your party, your cake WILL look bigger, but you'll look like a complete tool, who:

1. made 20 pounds of cake for your party that 8 people came to, or
2. are just serving your guests something made of wood and plaster

I feel for the guy. Rich as he must be now, there are times when, as he glues cheap ribbon onto a lamp shade and says "there, doesn't that look nice?" you can see it in his eyes: he knows better.